The Disney Channel Original Movie to Bisexual Pipeline
--
Happy pride month everyone!
In this week’s newsletter, I would like to take the time to discuss the impact of Disney Channel Original Movies from the very early 2000’s on myself and my bisexual journey. Of course, I am not the only one to have something within me unlock as I watched these made-for-television kid’s movies — there are dozens of threads about the DCOM to bisexual pipeline, and this is my contribution.
To start, I must mention that I can trace my sexual awakening back to the DCOM Smart House, where I was in love with a very sad, weepy Ryan Merriman who had to deal with the fact that his house wanted to fuck his dad. Sure, Ryan Merriman is very much a straight guy so this sexual awakening of mine isn’t super revolutionary but it did set the precedent of me being very into baby-faced emo guys and also piqued my interest in other Disney Channel Original Movies, some of which are significantly more gay. While a lot of them are important to my development as a person, today we are going to discuss two of the most bisexual (to me) movies out there.
Motocrossed
As a movie, Motocrossed is one of the best DCOMs out there. I haven’t watched it in probably close to two decades, but from what I can remember about it, it was a great movie. If you haven’t seen it already, it’s about two siblings, Andrea and Andrew Carson, who love to ride dirt bikes and do cool tricks. Their dad doesn’t think Andrea should like motocross, though, because she is a girl and girls shouldn’t do extreme sports. After her brother gets injured in a biking accident and thus can’t ride competitively, Andrea cuts her hair off and pretends to be Andrew. All at the same time, she starts to fall with one of her competitors.
For many reasons, this movie is sexually confusing, especially to a very young me. Obviously, the romantic love interest Dean is very cute but Andrea is also very cute. She really becomes very alluring (hot) when she cuts all of her hair off and starts doing sports more intensely. I was obsessed with this movie and I wanted to do extreme motorbike sports for a hot second. This did not work because I am not a sporty person. But I do love movies about hot people doing sports.
